i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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