I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Randomize
