your thong is hanging out like whoa
True but thats because hes a fetus.
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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