Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
