Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Randomize