I can't watch pbs sober anymore
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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