Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
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