So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Randomize
