If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
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