Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize