PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize