i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
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