I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
I'm passing your future prison.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
