I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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