Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
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