My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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