Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
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