That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
