Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
Randomize
