i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Randomize
