She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
