Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Randomize
