i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
