just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
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