dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
Randomize
