I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
Randomize
