i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
