I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
