I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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