everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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