that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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