can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
She needs sedatives and a leash
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
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