break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
