I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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