Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
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