i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
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