some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize