The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize
