i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
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