So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
