Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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