so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Randomize
