Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
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