But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Randomize
