I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize
