the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Randomize
