Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Randomize
