nut hugger
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Randomize
