Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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