Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize
